stay-at-home mom – Page 2

Living “Lavishly” on Less Than $25k: extended travel on a budget

Over the past few months I have repeatedly been hit with the question “how did you do it?? Wasn’t traveling for 7 months expensive??? And from this, I felt it important to share my tricks and tips on financially making extended travel possible on a budget.

The answer to the most commonly asked question that people pose when learning about our journey is no! Traveling for 7 months was not expensive and it is totally possible. So here is what we did.

We live for an amazing sunset! Puerto, Viejo, Costa Rica

1. Planned like crazy

We initially analyzed our monthly expenses in New York City to simply be reminded how ridiculously expensive things were for us. We then considered places we wanted to visit and began comparing the cost in those areas to what we spent in NYC monthly. After we completed a list of places we wanted to visit, we calculated the average cost for a family of three to live there for one month, and threw in a few hundreds extra just to be safe. We calculated a budget for the 7 months and got busy saving.

2. Saved our coins

Once we learned how much money we would need for our journey, we got busy saving. Being that our expenses in NYC were high, saving was challenging so we had to get creative. We started a savings jar that we contributed loose change to daily. We cut out eating out and put the money that we would typically spend on lunch into our saving fund. We collected bottles and would return them to the market each month to receive a bottle deposit refund. I participated in paid online surveys to raise a little extra money, and discontinued cable in our home. We tried to cut out any extra expenses that we could live without. 6 months prior to our journey, we sold everything in our apartment which brought in a large sum of money for us. We had weekly yard sales, posted on selling apps, and took our expensive items to consignment shops. In my free time, I did hair and makeup on the side to raise extra funds. Whatever money I had left over from my pay check after paying bills went to our travel saving account. At the end of everything, we were able to save over $16,000 USD for our trip.

3. Book a one-way ticket abroad and home

After we saved and allocated funds for our trip, we vaguely mapped out where we wanted to go and booked a one-way ticket to destination one and a one-way ticket back home from our last destination (essential to finalize our travel insurance). We picked our first destination and the ones to follow based on the best seasons to visit each place. We decided that we would use various means of transportation to travel to each of our destinations including land, water, and air travel. Whenever we needed to fly, we used special websites known for discounted airfare and only booked one-way tickets as we found it to be cheaper; and we often did not require roundtrip tickets being that we moved about.

4. Moved in with family

In efforts to continue saving money, to eliminate a crazy rent expense, and to still live comfortably after giving up all of our furniture, we moved in with family.

5. Purchase luggage

One of the last things we did before we set off on our journey was purchasing backpacking luggage for our family of 3. By trial and error, we practiced how to pack light and carry our backpacks.

6. Doctors appointments and insurance

As it got closer to the time for us to set out on our journey, we went to see our doctors for checkups and to secure medication for our time away. We then purchased inexpensive insurance plans that would cover us if we became ill abroad. A package for 3 people cost $ 150 USD for 7 months.

7. Book first destination airbnb

A few weeks before departure, we booked a place to stay via airbnb to avoid the hassle of doing so once we arrived at our first destination. During the course of our trip we used airbnb, Homeaway, and locals to help secure accommodation. We often found accomodation ranging from $15 USD per night to $40 USD per night. There were times we could splurge on a nice hotel or home when we came in under budget which was always nice; or we would eat out somewhere fancy which I loved.

8. Set out and stick to the budget

Following these minor steps, we left school and work and set out on our trip. We made sure we stuck to our budget to avoid running out of money. I maintained a notebook to be on task with budgeting and practiced a few routines to help with this. In areas where we needed to exchange money, we did so in the airport to get the best exchange rate. We shopped at local markets, ate the meal of the day whenever we ate out, cooked at home, and brought snacks on outings when we could. We also got accustomed to walking everywhere to eliminate travel expenses and downloaded maps to help us. We tried hard to do much of what a local would do to save money and it all worked out.

Ready to set out with all our luggage and gear

After all, we were able to live very nicely in each destination that we traveled to. In fact we spent about $12,600 for the 7 months we were away, and travled to Peru (Lima, Huacachina, Cuzco, and Puno), Panama (Panama City and Bocas del Toro), Costa Rica (San Jose, Monteverde, and Puerto Viejo), Nicaragua (Managua and Big Corn Island), Colombia (Bogota and Medellin), and Mexico (Playa del Carmen, Cancun, and Tulum). Our expenses for 7 months in all of these regions were equal to the cost for our expenses for 3-4 months in the states. Much of what we did were things that would be difficult for us to enjoy in the states. We got so much for our money and often felt that we were living lavishly. I was lucky to maintain remote employment to save for life when we returned home and to maintain expenses I had including loans, credit cards, and my vehicle that I was unable to sell prior to traveling. I signed up for income-based programs/options wherever possible and everything worked out very easy. The one tip that I will emphasize for anyone interested in trying this out, is researching the expenses for the places you will travel to, and allow yourself enough time to plan and save. I believe I have mastered these steps and feel well prepared to plan and budget for our next trip.

Such a tranquil sight… Big Corn Island, Nicaragua

I hope I have not missed anything but will be sure to add anything I may have forgotten at a later date. If you are interested in more details about blogs I used or websites I found helpful in the course of planning my travel, feel free to message me. Until next time…

Xoxo,

Millennial Mom

Our Road to Happiness: finding an alternative way

In October of 2016, my “mini me”, the love of my life, and I made a huge leap. We left behind our lives in New York City, packed our backpacks, and set out to travel South and Central America for seven months. Our journey away is not the typical travel/vacation that most people imagine. We have yet to stay in one place during our course of travel and much of our journey has been done on a budget. We have moved about five different countries thus far, living out of our backpacks, lodging in various types of accommodation from luxury apartments, to hotels, to hostels. It’s been an AMAZING journey to say the least. Traveling with a child based on our style of travel has been both a unique and challenging experience. All in all, our excursion was planned and executed to meet my baby girl’s dream of traveling and seeing more of the world. This journey is also very much related to my dream of traveling which I put on hold after I became a mother. Despite how different our experience has been from the lives we live at home and despite the challenges that come with the traveling lifestyle, I’d say it is well worth it. But before I share more about the challenges and the things that have made this nomadic journey so special, I must first share the reason why I gave up everything I owned, left my career of six years behind, withdrew my “mini me” from school, and hit the road. My story is one that I hope serves as an example that there is no one way to journey through this life; when a path presents a road block simply find an alternative way.

Whenever I share my current experience and new lifestyle with others (backpacking with a 7-year-old through 6 countries, home/worldschooling, and working from home), I am often met with responses showing that others are intrigued, fascinated, inspired, and eager to know more. I am also frequently met with critical questions such as “why would you leave such a great career and life to wander? weren’t you scared? what will you do when it’s all over?; questions that I find somewhat realistic and very much in touch with how I believe most mothers, working professionals, and Americans feel. However, I would not consider myself your typical mother, would argue that I am different from the average working professional, and believe I am someone difficult to compare to the average American. To answer the questions often posed to me as a traveling and homeschooling mom, I gave up my career, lifestyle, and everything I owned for several reasons. Before I share my reasoning for such a change, it is important to note that everything I did came after careful planning, weighing of pros and cons, years of trying various options, and brainstorming of how I could do better for my daughter and myself. During a time when I was a single mother with limited help to provide for my daughter, I realized that I had to find a better way to maintain our household without depending on my family or the “system” to do so. For several years, I tried different options that impacted my daughter and I negatively. The reality is after such trial and error, we were tired. We faced more than enough hardship and challenges throughout our years together, and were ready to throw in the towel. We were sad, bored, and in many ways desperate. In addition to wanting to meet all of our needs and give us better, I was desperately seeking genuine happiness for my little girl and myself; the happiness that I seemed to have forgotten about in my normal life while being overwhelmed with school and work.

Since 2010, my “mini me” and I have had a lot on our plates. We have been pushing every day to stay above water in several aspects of our lives. In 2010, I was in the process of completing a Master’s degree in Forensic Psychology and spent many days away from my little one. I was commuting from upstate New York to New York City for classes at John Jay College. This was my routine three days per week for one year. I would leave home at 5:30 am Monday, Wednesday, and Friday and return home after 6:00 pm. On the days that I did not attend classes, I was putting in hours at two internships, completing course work, hitting the gym, doing freelance work to maintain an income, and spending time with my daughter. It was no easy task but I always hustled with the belief that we would one day rise above our hardship. Sadly, my demanding commute and the repeated harassment I experienced from my daughter’s father often times made me feel like I was sinking. However, no matter how bad or tired I felt, I never gave up. I simply made changes in my life as needed. I was determined to be successful to give my “mini me” and I a better life and would do so by any means necessary. One of those means was leaving my baby in the care of my parents (my mother and step-father) for 1.5 years to go into what I call hiding; and to complete my degree with less distractions.

baby-girl-and-i Through it all, I maintained a smile…finding hope in the eyes of my “mini me”

In June of 2011, I relocated from my hometown in Monticello, New York, back to New York City where only my close friends and family knew where to find me. Living in my hometown, I was subjected to threats and harassment from my child’s father after I made the decision to leave him. I did not wish for such factors to hinder me from completing my degree and I wanted to remain safe. During my time in New York I was focused more on finishing my degree and began building a new life for my daughter and I. The two years that I spent finishing my degree were yet more sad and overwhelming times for me. I woke up alone daily, went to school for long hours or worked full-days, and went to bed the same way I awoke. Many nights I cried as I missed my daughter and although I tried to be optimistic, sometimes I did not believe some of the positive affirmations that I told myself. On weekends I traveled to the Catskills from my place of hiding to be with my family and returned home at the end of the weekend. This helped me feel less lonely and less guilty about being away from my daughter. The constant commuting was again no easy task but thankfully the day did finally come where we rose above and moved on from this stage in our lives. I graduated college with honors and completed my degree in Forensic Mental Health. I arranged for my baby girl to move down to NYC into our new and cozy apartment, and enrolled her in pre-school. Following my graduation, I was successful in landing my dream job providing therapy in a correctional facility, putting my degree to use. It appeared that the storm for us was passing and we were entering a state of calm.

One of the best days of my life, Graduation 2013; M.A, John Jay College

From May of 2012 to September of 2016, I worked hard to maintain a beautiful apartment in Brooklyn, New York for myself and my baby girl. In addition, I balanced all of our bills and expenses on my own paying close to $5,000 per month. I juggled school loans, childcare expenses, a car note, extra-curricular activities for Bree, and all of our monthly household and personal expenses. I continued to be optimistic throughout the process, maintaining the mindset that all my hard work would one day pay off. However, like any responsibility that requires hard work and dedication, there comes burnout after some time. After my years of being a dedicated mother, student, and professional, I was truly burned out from the work I was putting in. Although, I was familiar with burnout and mastered techniques to help me temporarily overcome it, I knew it was time to make a change when my little one too began showing signs that she was overwhelmed. Despite my fatigue, it was evident that my hard work was yielding favorable results. However I was still confident that there had to be another way. One of our favorite ways to find a place of calm… outdoors (here we are pictured while camping in Promise Land State Park, PA)

In the winter of 2015, my “mini me” began showing signs that I never saw before. During mornings when I would drop her off to school, she would cry for reasons that I did not understand. When I would pick her up from school, she would spend her evening clinging to me and begging to stay home from school the following day. These behaviors were new to me and one day prompted me to have a talk with Bree. I asked her what changed and her response was simple. She told me that she was TIRED of being away from me, TIRED of spending long hours in school, TIRED of spending dinner time and bath time with her nanny, and TIRED of seeing me tired. This for me was hard to swallow and brought about great sadness. I realized that in my efforts to give my daughter a better life I was causing her loneliness and sadness. In addition, she was trying her hardest to thrive in a single-parent household. This realization was the moment that I knew I had to make changes. I needed to begin brainstorming a plan that would allow Bree and I to live comfortably while spending more time together, a plan that would allow me to still feel that I was successful in my career and making use of my education, and a plan that would allow me to create a life that ultimately allowed Bree and I to be genuinely happy. And so the planning began…

school-and-work School/work days in NYC started something like this

Stay tuned for part II of Our Road to Happiness: finding an alternative way

Until next time…

xoxo

Millennial Mom

Getting to Know Us

Meet the fam!

Hello,

Welcome to Millennial Mom; a blog where my family and I will share our personal experiences with you as they relate to modern-day parenting, full-time family travel abroad, homeschooling/world-schooling, family exercise, family fun, family issues, meal prep, and so much more. You’ll have the opportunity to read about why I consider myself a Millennial Mom and young matriarch; and learn about the values of my family and how our lifestyle is different from the traditional family. However, before I delve into that I want to take a moment and introduce who we are as a family unit. Getting to know us will help our readers and followers understand us individually, understand our roles, and understand the journey that we are currently on.

My name is Tanisha G. and I am a 27- year-old mom originally from Upstate New York. At present I like to call myself a gypsy as I have no desire to stay in one place, and I travel full-time with my daughter and partner. I consider every place I travel my home and I doubt that there is any bigger home than the world itself. My home base is in New York City. I am a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and spent 6 years of my life studying Forensic Psychology to obtain my Master’s degree. I currently work remotely for a private practice as a Forensic Report Writer. I recently gave up my full-time job of four years working on Rikers Island providing mental health services and counseling to inmates. I departed from my job to take on the role as a full-time, stay-at-home mom, to push many of my creative interests, and to begin focusing on how to grow my own practice in psychology. I now spend my days caring for and schooling my “mini me” and devoting my time to the love of my life. I do all of this while juggling: working from home/abroad, maintaining my social life and glam girl appearance, planning the future ahead, and staying on top of my career goals. My goal and purpose in both this blog and in life is to be an inspiration to other mothers (particularly those who are young and facing hardship as I have been there at a point and time in my life), to share my unique experiences with the world, and to show anyone that anything is possible.

Meet my “mini me” A’Bree (pronounce Ayy-Bree) or you can just call her Bree! She is 7-years-old and one of the biggest blessings I could have ever received in this life. Bree is a unique child who I would describe as far beyond her years. She is eager to learn and has shown an interest in traveling to learn about the world around her. She loves to write, sing, and dance. She enjoys helping me cook and create meals, participates in “mommy and me” yoga sessions, and loves “glam time” with me where we do hair, nails, and makeup. For many years Bree and I were a single mama-daughter duo. During this time she was my strength and motivation; a selfless, understanding, and loving child. Bree is not only my daughter but my best friend. I cherish her as the gem that she is and dedicate my every day to being the best mama I can be.

school-girl-bree

Our lives were recently changed after the love of my life joined us and filled the biggest void. Meet Ilya (pronounced Eel- yaa) or you can call him Elli. Elli has served as both an amazing partner to me and as a supportive father figure to Bree. I describe him as the most dedicated, loyal, loving, and kind partner that I could have ever asked for. In our daily life he juggles many roles, sometimes assuming my regular roles when I am tired or overwhelmed. He tolerates my craziness, my one million and one ideas/plans for the future, and keeps me level headed in my hectic life. He gave up his life in New York City this past summer to travel the world with A’Bree and I for eight months. Together our family has journeyed through Central and South America to fulfill our daughter’s dream of seeing the world. We have shared some amazing experiences that we now hope to share with the rest of the world.

family-pic

Stayed tuned for what we have to come! I can assure you that our blog will be a place where you can come for creative ideas, inspiration, a good laugh, and stories to warm your heart. Thank you for taking time to get to know us. Until next time….

xoxo

Millennial Mom